Knowing Yourself Before Knowing Another

@Knowing Yourself Before Knowing Another



Before you can truly connect with another person, you must first understand the person staring back at you in the mirror. Who you are, what you value, and what you will not compromise define the quality of every relationship you enter. Ignorance of self often leads to misplaced trust, misaligned expectations, and heartbreak that could have been avoided.


Knowing yourself begins with asking hard questions: What drives me? What wounds still shape my reactions? What do I truly want in a life partner? Take a moment to reflect: what are your non-negotiables in life and relationships? Identifying these boundaries is not a checklist—it is a process of uncovering patterns in your choices, understanding your priorities, and clarifying the principles that will guide your decisions.


Self-awareness also involves understanding your emotional triggers and personal boundaries. When you can name what excites you, what scares you, and what pushes your limits, you gain clarity on how to respond wisely, communicate honestly, and avoid being manipulated or rushed. Relationships entered from this place of strength and insight are far less likely to be turbulent or misleading.


Many enter relationships without this knowledge, hoping love will fill the gaps in understanding or compensate for uncertainty. The result is often confusion, compromise, and repeated mistakes. By taking the time to know yourself deeply, you prevent these traps, equipping yourself to choose wisely when the right person arrives.


True self-awareness is not a one-time exercise; it is a lifelong commitment. Journal your reflections, revisit your answers, and discuss your insights with a trusted and credible mentor. Let these practices become the foundation of every connection you pursue, ensuring that when you do meet someone, it is not out of need or impulse, but from a position of clarity, confidence, and readiness.


Yours in fulfilment,


*@Otunba Femi Abiola, CMIE, MCE*

*@President*

*@Project Youth Fulfil*


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